Prisms and Feelings.

“She was a genius of sadness, immersing herself in it, separating its numerous strands, appreciating its subtle nuances. She was a prism through which sadness could be divided into its infinite spectrum.” 

― Jonathan Safran Foer, Everything Is Illuminated

How many times do we wish to be zapped into oblivion because reality gets in the way of our dreams or acting happy?  It's something that has been perplexing me for quite some time, especially more so this past month. (September-worst month ever. Wake Me Up When September Ends makes so much sense now.) 

But sadness is a feeling that we can't really let go of. We cannot control it, all we can simply hope for is that (even though it seems impossible) is inexplicably wait for sunshine. That the prism refracts a rainbow after the rain. But lo and behold, the minute we feel that we have let go, our unsatisfied human selves find themselves in yet another puzzle called grief. And to be honest, its quite alright. Feelings are meant to be felt just as the stars are meant to light up the dark. Its what makes us human. And it IS what inspires me. Every day. Not kidding.
(Oh, and yes, the uncredited poems featured in my blogs are written by me.)

They say life is a sad song. But aren't sad songs the most beautiful? 

We live lives riddled with misery, stay up nights fuelled by Red Bull. 

Our tears are words, our tears are stories, 

Our smiles are chapters, our smiles are glory. 

With happiness around, all we seem to find is sorrow. 

Anxiety, grief, feelings none can borrow. 

Maybe they can, if you could see, 

You're not alone, and You never shall be. 

What makes us human, is our pain. 

Our scarred hearts, trying to hope again. 

Taaron ke beech, hum raat ke humsafar,         (Amongst the stars, we lovers of the night,

Anjaane paheli ke rah par.                              An unknown puzzle, a journey in sight. 

Na suraj jaane, naa chandaniyaan,                   Know not the daystar nor the moonlight. 

Andhere se baatein karte zaroor hai,                Why do we converse with the after-light,   

Toh phir kyun hai subah ka intezaar?               and wait for the morning?)

SO. Basically. Sadness isn't necessarily a bad thing. 

How on earth would we know what happiness felt like if we didn't experience all the sadness around us? Well, at least what makes us happy for a fraction of a minute before we find some fault in it and wither away into the shadows of grief.

"Whats so simple in the moonlight, by the morning, never is."

No, I am not asking any of you to be stuck in sadness. That would be depression, or worse. I merely ask you to look around yourself when you're in that zone, and imbibe the sadness into ourselves in such a way that it be a doorway to understanding the feelings of compassion, kindness, profound bliss, merry and above all, love. 

We humans, tend to choose things that make us unhappy and sad- we have a knack for choosing things that destroy us. Happiness, that way, shall NEVER be ours. Because, we also tend to forget that happiness is just a result of recognising and appreciating all that we have- family, friends, puppies, rainbows, prisms that show us a spectrum of light and love that we deserve. 

I wake up every day and crank up some happy music. I decide that I shall feel sorrow. But I shall also feel happiness. And love. And peace. 

My prism shall refract a spectrum of all these feelings that are meant to be felt. 

Bubbles of light, 

Ankita.